Ok, All of the sudden my life is all turned upside down and complicated. You know how i was so happy today? Ya that wasnt really happiness, that was hysteria. Seriously, oh, and dont think that when i left school it stopped. Oh no. It continued the whole, nite. Until i got into the truck to come home. Then i just felt like throwing up. I dont know what happened. It was obviously a combination of things. The last time I went hysterical was in March (by the way, still really sorry about that). AHHHHHHHHHH my thoughts are all in a Jumble!!! A THOUGHT JUMBLE. I think im going to have a little bit of a break down. Perhaps some organization is in order. Here goes.

1. I dont know why it bothers me soo very much. But it does.
2. Im so very unorganized for grad.
3. Im so very unprepared for Ickies.
4. (just so you know, i just wrote 3, again. gah) I feel like im setting myself up for a HUGE MASSIVE DEPRESSION inducing fall. It sucks. A lot. So much so, that im super worried. AHH
5. What if what i think i want, i dont, or i do, but i also maybe want something else. And what if i cant choose?
6. My horoscope is creepily correct. I dont really like it. 2 Days in a row.
7. Period 4 spares are running out.
8. AND im supposed to work on friday at 1pm, BUT I HAVE THE FUCKING GRAD REHEARSAL AT 1250... this is horse shit. Did anyone else know that we had that fucking thing then. No, i didnt think so.

Ahh Ha. I have found a solution. Well, temporary anyway. I havent cried since opening nite. I have refused. Thats what i need to do. It always makes you feel better. To just let it all out. Except, now i wish i hadnt promised myself i wouldnt cry anymore. Shit.

ttfn, so un-jiggy...

PS. I have my own set of words, and rules to go along with them. ta ha.
PPS. Today. I saw the funniest thing. A middle aged man riding a bicycle. With his huge ass crack hanging out. TEEHEE. The best part is, that i made Tristan look too. I dont know why, but he didnt think it was that funny.