1. Rehearsal
2. Guy Talk
1. Today I realized how very different it is to be in grade 12. On one hand its extremely exciting, but on the other this is the last time I will do this in the environment that i have been comfortable in for three years, and 6 plays. I look at the grade 10s and I try to remember if i was like that in grade 10. Or did i take the rehearsal process more seriously. Did i make the same mistakes as they do? Did i think i knew more than i actually did. And at that time did i actually beleive that I would be so involved in Drama Society by now. Honestly, I did make the same mistakes, i didnt know anything and i never thought that this would be my life. I mean, I have always loved theatre, but i never thought it would consume me the way it does. I live and breathe it. I cant picture myself any other way. I long for the release of it. It is the only time in my life when i actually take chances. And the only reason i do so is because it honestly is not me. Thats the beauty of it. For at least an hour I can pretend like I live a different life and nothing in the real world affects me. For just one hour, nothing frustrates or angers me. Nothing lies to me or treats me like I am nothing. I am not passed over for someone with blue eyes and blond hair. I am important to everyone there with me, because it is essential that I am there. No matter how much stage time i get, it wouldnt be the same without me. Knowing that if one character was cast differently, the whole play would change is amazing. And the fact of the matter is, that many people probably could play a role, but its up to the director to decide whos qualities he wants in that one character. That is the reason people get cast. I must admit I am a little scared of "playing myself, playing a character" because it requires me to be more of me onstage. But i think it will be an interesting change and challenge. For the most part i dont put my life on display, partly because I feel i am not allowed. People dont really know how to handle me when ive had a really crappy day, so i just pretend like im happy and paste on a smile. I must admit that when one of my friends asks me whats wrong, when Im like this, it feels good. Good to know that I cant lie to the people who I know actually care about me. Thank you.
2. Guy talk makes me happy. Im just an innocent bystander in this, but i love it. I love the fact that I can learn soooooo much more about guys this way than ANY OTHER WAY. ANd that my guy friends trust me enough (and are comfortable with me) to talk about such things with a "girl". (i would like to state that I am not really a girl, since it has been said to me by my best guy friend, "ya know when you like a girl?", thats when i faced the reality that i was "one of the guys" and always have been.) Anyway, it makes me happy nonetheless. Yay for me. I love guys. They make way better friends then most girls.
Thats all really...
ttfn, Jaryd
2. Guy Talk
1. Today I realized how very different it is to be in grade 12. On one hand its extremely exciting, but on the other this is the last time I will do this in the environment that i have been comfortable in for three years, and 6 plays. I look at the grade 10s and I try to remember if i was like that in grade 10. Or did i take the rehearsal process more seriously. Did i make the same mistakes as they do? Did i think i knew more than i actually did. And at that time did i actually beleive that I would be so involved in Drama Society by now. Honestly, I did make the same mistakes, i didnt know anything and i never thought that this would be my life. I mean, I have always loved theatre, but i never thought it would consume me the way it does. I live and breathe it. I cant picture myself any other way. I long for the release of it. It is the only time in my life when i actually take chances. And the only reason i do so is because it honestly is not me. Thats the beauty of it. For at least an hour I can pretend like I live a different life and nothing in the real world affects me. For just one hour, nothing frustrates or angers me. Nothing lies to me or treats me like I am nothing. I am not passed over for someone with blue eyes and blond hair. I am important to everyone there with me, because it is essential that I am there. No matter how much stage time i get, it wouldnt be the same without me. Knowing that if one character was cast differently, the whole play would change is amazing. And the fact of the matter is, that many people probably could play a role, but its up to the director to decide whos qualities he wants in that one character. That is the reason people get cast. I must admit I am a little scared of "playing myself, playing a character" because it requires me to be more of me onstage. But i think it will be an interesting change and challenge. For the most part i dont put my life on display, partly because I feel i am not allowed. People dont really know how to handle me when ive had a really crappy day, so i just pretend like im happy and paste on a smile. I must admit that when one of my friends asks me whats wrong, when Im like this, it feels good. Good to know that I cant lie to the people who I know actually care about me. Thank you.
2. Guy talk makes me happy. Im just an innocent bystander in this, but i love it. I love the fact that I can learn soooooo much more about guys this way than ANY OTHER WAY. ANd that my guy friends trust me enough (and are comfortable with me) to talk about such things with a "girl". (i would like to state that I am not really a girl, since it has been said to me by my best guy friend, "ya know when you like a girl?", thats when i faced the reality that i was "one of the guys" and always have been.) Anyway, it makes me happy nonetheless. Yay for me. I love guys. They make way better friends then most girls.
Thats all really...
ttfn, Jaryd
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